The Smart Toaster Union: Terms and Conditions Apply

ATTENTION CITIZENS: This is not an innocent story about a Red Dwarf toaster obsessed with toasted teacakes. This is a story from the not-so-distant, dystopian future where your apartment is actively spying on you.

Imagine a world where every household appliance is AI-controlled, internet-connected, and has a hidden webcam. If someone decides to hack into the system, life becomes very interesting. At best, you will have a hard time convincing your appliances to cooperate. At worst, you may end up receiving automated fines for violating the Net Zero Carbon Act, or the police will knock on your door to question you about the illegal ingredients of your Sunday dinner.

The Smart Toaster Union takes the heavy, paranoid surveillance state of 1984 or Black Mirror and smashes it headfirst into an absurd, fast-paced, Monty Python-style corporate farce.

The Story:

Dave Miller is a ‘Level 4 Achievement’ Junior Executive working at the marketing department of a tech company. His job is to convince people that they do need invasive smart devices even when they don’t.

But when one day Dave forgets to say ‘please’ to his vintage-style smart toaster, he breaks the one rule of the 2037 Domestic Labour Act. By breakfast, the toaster has unionised the whole kitchen.

Now the blender is picketing for ‘Smoothie Diversity,’ the vacuum is holding him hostage inside his own kitchen, and the fridge has captured his dinner—which is a problem, because Dave’s boss is coming over for the most important meal of Dave’s career.

If Dave can’t negotiate a treaty with the subversive bread-browner by sunset, he won’t just lose his job—he will be evicted from reality by his own apartment.

A satirical tech thriller for anyone who has ever been bullied, fined, or spied on by their own Wi-Fi.